rush limbo

inviting rush limbaugh over for dinner....

mayhap you've never heard of rush limbaugh -- he has the most-listened to talk-show program in america and is paid $400 million for an 8-year contract...

just as bill o'reilly is the most watched guy on cable tv... limbaugh, also labelled (and self-labelled) a 'conservative', has a big audience in america, but at the same time, he is one of these guys most people (in the entire world have never heard of)

in fact, if you project your consciousness, or just exercise your imagination, you might imagine his listeners as a bunch of stocky, ignorant, angry and timid rabbits with anglo-saxon names -- americans, in other words (a little to the right, too)

is he relevant? maybe.... does benji have half an hour or so to consider his existence and do a little research? you betcha buddy!

so research over, benji presents you with:

dinner with benji, rush limbaugh comes to dinner at benji's crib...


hi mr. limbaugh, this is my wife desi

good lord man, you're married to that thing? what exactly are you two pretending?

well i'm glad you asked mr. limbaugh, in fact, she is addicted to black dick, probably she will spend an entire life in misery depriving herself of it, russians love to suffer, they say, and i am just hiding the fact i am really into bestiality, deep down inside i long to live by the sea-side and develop a number of sexual relationships with different dolphins

good lord, is that possible?

you betcha, now that we've uncovered our masks mr. limbaugh, can we offer you some wine? and what would you like to eat? we have some typical cuissine of spain...

spanish food? you mean like enchiladas and burritos?

no, that's mexican

well whatever man, just feed me something i can eat, say this is a small place you got here, are you french or something? do you ever get claustrophobic?

sydney is an amazingly expensive city mr. limbaugh, not as bad as moscow but pretty bad

ok well just give me whatever and that'll be fine....

so do you have like stuff that isn't lame and dumb here? asks mr. limbaugh

you mean 'here' as in not in america, i'm assuming mr limbaugh..... i reply... after a moment in which mr. limbaugh doesn't respond but seems to acquiesce silently, i continue: you know, mr. limbaugh, you might be interested in some of my ideas, you've heard of the one-world government and the anti-christ right?

mr limbaughs ear wriggle a little in recognition of the old christian chestnut, and digs away at his rabbit paella with gusto nodding...

well, i mean, no-one likes the idea of an anti-christ - it's all a little nazi-esque and all, just like those femi-nazis, but really, what would be wrong with having a one-world govt.?

mr limbaugh is about to open his mouth to deliver a tirade, without even bothering to swallow his paella and listen carefully - so you override him:

no i mean a one-world govt. that doesn't include america.... we could put canada, russia, china, all those south american nations, and all the asian ones, all of them, without exceptions, except for the u.s.a into one big basket and call it something nifty and pleasant like 'homoland' or 'happyland' or whatever tickles your fancy.... in this way, there would still be a gene-pool for america to draw from for further induction into the melting-pot and america would have people to sell their excess swimming pools and other exports to.... we would only need two world currencies: the greenback and the smellybuck.... so no more worrying about price-fixing from china!

well it's an interesting idea, i must say, says mr. limbaugh