Saturday, March 6, 2010

howdy shluts

so recently -- ranting and whining about George Clooney --- actually what Clooney should do is play Tiger Woods in a movie made for the Hallmark Channel --- you know that Hollywood trailer voice that tries to move you to think that if you don't like the movie trailer and watch the movie than you are the only one insane person in a world full of insane people? Wouldn't it be cool to hear one of those voiceover's saying: "from the people who brought you 'Arse' and 'Get fucked you fucken shlut', comes a new spin on Tiger Woods; George Cloney as you've never seen him before,"

then of course the video trailer would cut to Clooney changing nappies with a cell phone on his shoulder and looking over his shoulder, "Sure Monique, I gots time for you this evening, rock n roll, let's do it girl"..........

and so it goes....... if Clooney made such a movie he would have 2 or 3 movies under his belt........... as it stands, Clooney's only two movies are: O Brother, Where Art Thou (wherein his performance was acceptable) and Dusk Til Dawn (wherein he was dragged along by other talent)........ apart from this, Clooney has made NO FILMS.... Syriana is not a film or movie anymore than Andy Warhol filming trees for 2 hours is a film or me putting a hidden camera in my toilet bowl while i take a dumpp constitutes a movie........... therefore Ocean's 11 and Ocean's 12 are not movies either, regardless of how pretty Julia Roberts, Brad Pitt and George Clooney are --- none of them get a credit for the Ocean's movie as I have done more artistic patterns on my toilet bowel when shitting............. probably I looked prettier than the above-mentioned people at the time of my pooping too...........

Kalifornia and 12 Monkeys ARE movies ............. but Notting Hill ISN'T a movie so much as a propaganda, social-advertising promoting lesbianism.......

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