it is a little known fact that Trey Parker from South Park and Sarah Jessica Parker from Sex in the City are husband and wife and never had time to meet even once nor have sex even once (together) -- hence procreation -- the all-important function of sex -- was achieved by Parker sending Parker some reproductive matter in an envelope with a letter attached saying: Death to America, Death to Israel
'How romantic,' thought Parker and reached for the Turkey baster and the microwave dish to warm up the frozen reproductive specimen.
The two just had busy lifestyles and wouldn't have liked eachother much and anyway, they had hundreds (or thousands) of other people to have sex with. Also, Sarah Jessica Parker had run away from her father, Shylock, from the Shakespeare play, 'the Merchant of Venice' - so now Leonardo would have a beef with Parker too due to the oath he swore to bloods and crips in LA to represent Venice (LA - not Italy).
Anyway, as luck had it - Shakespeare faked his own death and went on to die, go to heaven, and return as Jimi Hendrix to play No Leaf Clover with Jefferson, Franklin (and Mozart); and Sarah Jessica Parker, to her father's dismay went on to champion promiscuity and sluttiness:
'Be a whore or you will be a Taliban lover,' said Parker.
Children around the world and America were confused, in America, sex education classes were telling children to be like Parker or else they would be Talibanis.
Children were shown a video that showed Parker rubbing up against a man's leg and saying, 'meow, buy me that car and i'll make love to you, meow, don't be a Taliban.'
Children that didn't want to be sluts were feeling overwhelmed - some of them decided to be exchange students to run away from all the horrible sluttiness and decrepitude masqueraded as sophistication by Parker in the name of being anti-Talibani. Many exchange students went to Eastern European and Russian high schools and found the children enjoyed group sex and despised gay-right movements as it made them feel like they were gay for enjoying in both-sex threesomes and foursomes and more (spaghetti).
'Be a whore! Not a Talibani!' said Parker.
'Are you pregnant with my seed?' asked the other Parker via satellite hook-up as the two had never met before: busy schedules and such and they wouldn't have liked eachother much.
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