if ur of the male sex, probably not even worthy of the title 'man' ... How about a new spouse? Consider dick cheney or britney spears...
If ur a wetback...either party will get u a green card...although only some places will allow a gay marriage
cheney's pretty old, u could try some ethanol and bashing his head a few times and then blaming his heart condition... If ur included in his will u might cash in
in the breast dept. Spears has him beat...dont even consider cheneys sagging, wrinkling man-boobs...go w. Spears everytime
in the cuddle dept. U could probably do a lot worse...both types look pretty cuddly...spears probably more likely to get up all the time for random shit like cream cheese on celery... Consider cheney for long subdued periods of cuddling
both parties could probably improve ur standing in society...consider buying a nice suit to accompany them to black tie events and other shindigs
cheney probably more economical in the supermarket aisle... But if ur able to insinuate urself into their checkbook dont sweat it either way
cheney has no vagina (big drawback) and spears has a demonstrated ability to keep hers nicely shaved: no brainer
unclear if either party can cook... If u can consider getting cheney restricted to a wheelchair, might save u a few calories if ur not one for walking about much, consider getting a golf cart to move around together in
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