In Russia, a University student with debts to loansharks who was in mortal peril of having his ears chopped off by them, watched an interview with the Tsar of the Old World (Larry King) and a politician from Russia...
"Putin has university-aged daughters??" asked the loanshark-fearing Raskalnikov... the people at the orphanage had named him after the famous character from a Doystoyevsky novel who unfortunately romanticized about the benefits of killing someone merely for the sake of it, for the pleasure of the thrill --- this was really serial-killer thinking, however no scholar of Russian literature had fingered Dostoyevsky's Raskalnikov as a serial killer, -- happily, our Raskalnikov was not a killer, but a chronic gambler addicted to online gaming ... being quite a drinker, and given to emotional behavior, the idea occurred to him that if he were able to secure the hand of the Russian Minister's daughter, then surely he would have protection from the loansharks who would soon come for him to cut his ears off...
"I will woo her off her feet, tell her a few poems, she will be falling over herself to make me lunches and do my homework and give me all of her spare change and I will have a security detail from the Kremlin itself to protect me... soon the loansharks will be running from me! ha ha ha ha," so boasted Raskalnikov to his poker friends.
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