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some ppl at the United Nations and some museum in France decided to carry out a study to figure out how boring ppl really were and how it could be expressed mathematically, given the differences in various cultures... they factored in fun things like drinking alcohol and flirting.... smoking pot and socializing in bars.... watching tv for 10 hours a day... cutting one's own body or general self-flagellation.... wife-beating.... flying around in a private jet... masturbating... and so on and so forth.......... a whole bunch of data was fed into a computer and leading sociologists and cultural and religious experts gathered their minds together and CNN fortunately wasn't there to muddy the waters up -- Bollywood was taken into account, Hollywood, the South Korean entertainment industry that wowed mainland china... suicide bombers were studied, warriors, terrorists, fathers, mothers, school teachers... autistic ppl, gays, hot-air balloon pilots, air-force pilots... gypsies, jews, drug-dealers.... everyone had a consciousness, a mind, their own pair of arms and hands for getting things and moving them and scratching with.... legs to run on, kick with, dance on.... a mind to think with... precious thoughts to go over and recollect in the quiet of a jail cell in isolation month after month.... schizophrenic visions that flash like lightning through the mind... artistic visualizations to paint... words to write... songs to sing, instruments to play, rivers to walk aside, stars to sleep under... hills to roll down... board games in exotic far flung towns to play...... all was fed into the giant matrix.... the answer finally arrived, who was happiest, most beloved by God... it couldn't be Jesus as he was no longer in human form.... it wasn't anyone from Stanford.... it wasn't some political dissident in Asia popular with some gringos half a world away .... the dopest, phattest, silliest and raddest person was... according to the big machine and the expert input, that person's name was: